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Ron Channell, who was at the kitchen door when Rock came out, said, "If I were you, I'd go right back in there and tell that guy to move out. She really was a bit more royal and chic than QEI. I wait three hours and he doesn't show up. And I gather from the trailer that Elizabeth is supposed to be losing her looks as the film goes on and Mary keeps hers For example, should Admiral Robert E.

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Guests began to arrive, and Dean and Rock could not talk further. It was a warm night, and the guests drifted out to the balcony. Dean was in the kitchen, cooking, when Rock came in, leaned back against the sink and started to sob. Why me? Dean says Rock was overcome with shame. That was his main concern—that the public would find out. If only that would happen.

Dean felt honored that Rock had chosen him to confide in, and took up the task of being Rock's support. He stopped calling people, and in Hollywood, if you don't invite people, you stop getting invitations. Also, he was becoming so dour and withdrawn, he wouldn't participate in conversations.

He had no social life anywhere but here. Dean consulted his doctor to see if there was any danger of exposing his other guests to AIDS. Because if they could, I was taking people's lives in my hands. As the months went on, Dean says, the guests he invited for Rock became "less interesting, but safer.

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I didn't want people in the business to see him looking poor, because they would gossip.

Rock entered a period where he refused to believe he had the disease. He began staying out late, drinking and smoking more, even though he had been told that alcohol and cigarettes lower the white-cell count. He went to the opening of Evita, ignoring a warning to avoid crowds because he was susceptible to any sickness present. When Mark reminded him of the doctors' counsel, Rock silenced him with a wave.

Rock was losing weight rapidly, and friends began to ask Mark and Dean if he had cancer. Mark and Dean would say, no, but maybe he has anorexia—is that possible? Mark said it often struck men at his age who tried to recapture the weight of their youth and went too far. No one really bought the story of anorexia, but no one was willing to believe, either, the vague rumors that Rock had AIDS.

People discounted it as gossip; it was too horrible to believe. Elizabeth Taylor said she thought Rock had cancer, but she didn't feel she could ask him about it. The drug was being tested in Paris, and the woman's son had gone there for treatment and was improving. Dean showed the letter to Rock, who gave it to Mark, who called Dr. Gottheb and asked about HPA Gottlieb said he could arrange for Rock to be given the drug by Dr.

Dominique Dormont at the Percy Hospital outside Paris. He warned that it was experimental and might lead nowhere, but on the other hand, it might prolong Rock's life. Mark and Dean started to work on Rock. Here, they could do nothing. Rock agreed, and Dr.

Gottlieb said he would have to go for seven or eight weeks. Who could go with him? Mark didn't want to leave George for eight weeks. Rock said he wouldn't go with Marc Christian. He had thought of taking Dean, but Dean knew he had AIDS, and it would be a heavy-hearted journey to the court of last hope. With Ron, he could pretend they were on Holiday. Rock had received an invitation to the Deauville Film Festival for a George Stevens Retrospective, and that would be his cover.

He invited Ron to go to the festival with him and take a vacation in Europe. They could continue their workouts, and Rock would keep him on salary. The next day. Rock told Ron he was working on a film project, and had to go to "story meetings" every morning. On the second or third day, he accidentally took off" his shirt in front of Ron, revealing a bruise on his arm from the IV needle.

Dormont, established an immediate rapport with Rock. He found that Rock's condition was good, "the disease was not very advanced, but his immune system was badly impaired. It was the course of treatment they had found most effective. He explained that the drug doesn't stay in the body so it's necessary to have injections every day to inhibit the virus. Rock said he could not stay that long, he had work to do in films.

Dormont said there was a shorter course of treatment, but it was more intense: Rock would come to the hospital every day for a week and have three-hour infusions of the drug. He would then take a week off, have another week of infusions and continue for four cycles. Rock agreed, and they started that morning. When I interviewed Dr. Dormont in December of , he said, "If Rock had agreed to stay in Paris for a long-term course, probably the disease would have stabilized.

But he felt the work in films was more important. My impression was, he was thinking Rock Hudson couldn't be killed by this virus. Mark Miller called Rock to see how the first day of treatment had gone. James thought he was laughing. George Nader suggested that James leave the house immediately or he might be branded as having worked in an AIDS household and have difficulty finding another job.

James refused. You don't leave a person at a time like this. While they were traveling, Rock's agent called Mark Miller and said that Esther Shapiro, the creator and producer of Dynasty, wanted to see Rock about doing a part on the show. Esther Shapiro had been a fan of Rock's since seeing him in Giant, and had always wanted to do a project with him. She and her husband, Richard Shapiro, had created the character of Daniel Reece, a wealthy rancher, with the idea that if the character worked, it could be the basis for a spinoff series.

She decided to go after Rock. His agent at that time, Marty Baum at C. If you will get me a meeting, I will go anywhere. Esther flew to Paris one day, and Rock asked her to come to the Ritz and have tea. Here I was, flying fourteen thousand miles to have tea with Rock Hudson. I'd heard rumors he was sick, but he looked wonderful to me. He was wearing khaki pants and a bush jacket.

Rock's presence was still so dazzling that it overpowered the eye, and people did not notice the physical signs of illness and deterioration that showed up in still photographs. Rock started telling her all the reasons he hated doing television. She told him that on Dynasty, they operated more like a repertory group and the actors had time to work on material. I said, please don't feel pressured, just because I've flown all this way.

I've heard no before, and if I hear it from you, I'll go on. She nodded, and did not ask what he thought. Rock began telling her again how he hated doing television. I don't think it could help, you've already arrived. Rock said he didn't think a soap opera was his milieu, but he admitted he liked to work. He looked at Esther and smiled. Maybe I'll just do it.

Dormont cultured his blood and found no AIDS virus present. He told Rock the treatment had been successful, the virus had been inhibited, but he cautioned him that he still had the disease. Dormont said. Rock said he wouldn't be able to come back before February because he was going to do a TV show, Dynasty.

Dormont said later, "I'm sure he heard what I said, but he didn't want to understand all my sentences. He understood what he wanted to understand. Dormont waited for Rock to return in February, March and April, but to his disappointment. Rock never came.

The doctor received a case of champagne and flowers, sent by Mark Miller, but he did not hear from or see Rock until July of , when Rock collapsed and was taken to the American Hospital. Ron's father had called the house and asked Christian, "When are the boys gonna get back from Paris? Why was this done behind my back? It's up to Rock to tell you. Don't look to me for your information.

Marc Christian had gone away for the weekend. When Rock was alone with Mark in the kitchen, he told him he had great news: The serum had worked. There was no more AIDS virus in his blood. Mark nearly fainted with joy and relief. Rock did not tell him the rest of Dr.

Dormont's message, that he still had the disease, and that he would have to stay on HPA 23 or the virus would grow back. What Mark Miller heard was that Rock was saved. The virus had been killed. Rock looked wonderful, he hadn't lost any weight in seven weeks, and he was elated.

I've licked it! I told you, I never had it in the first place. Within a few weeks of Rock's return from Paris in October of , the bubble had burst. What the hell is happening? The skin of his face had the creased and saggy look of elephant skin. He was sleeping twelve hours a night, and collapsing after lunch to sleep for another two hours.

Mark Miller says Dr. Sugarman was upset that Rock had agreed to do Dynasty. He asked why Rock was jeopardizing his health, he might not get through the show, he might not see Christmas. Rock would listen, at this time, to no one but Ron Channell. Ron persuaded Rock to start eating breakfast, which he had never done, and Rock would pick at eggs and toast and maybe eat half a portion.

Rock started wearing only his jockey shorts around the house, and the staff was shocked at the way his bones protruded. John Dobbs blurted, "Mr. Hudson, you've got to eat more. When Mark told Rock he had informed James of his illness. Rock did not speak to James for three days.

He was so embarrassed and ashamed, he couldn't face me. But then he came round," James says. Rock was depressed and silent much of the time. He would tell Rock stories he knew would make him laugh, "and he'd barely react. Before, no matter how low he was, I could always get him to giggle. I could make him fall on the floor, but now I couldn't.

I was losing him. At the end of October, Rock started work on Dynasty. He had made a commitment to do six episodes, with an option for four more and a spinoff series the following year. When he was shooting. Rock joked and chatted with the cast, but when he was not required on the set, he went to his trailer and slept.

He did not eat with the cast, because he had no appetite and was beginning to throw up meals. The assistant director would come to his trailer to call him for scenes, and once she had trouble waking him. She spoke to him, touched his arm, then had to rock and shake him. He was really out—completely unconscious. Rock's memory was failing, and he had to have cue cards, which was humiliating.

It meant he could not perform the most basic part of his craft —memorizing lines. The makeup man. Jack Freeman, who had worked with Rock before, said, "His coloring was pale. I did what I could to make him look better, but it was evident he wasn't well or strong.

And yet, his face would light up at times and he'd look wonderful. Esther Shapiro says, "I would have kept him forever. I thought he was magical on screen. He looked tired at the end, but it was the end of the season. None of us thought he was seriously ill.

The ill have rights, and other actors have rights too. Rock was pleased with his appearance on Dynasty. He would ask friends, "See Dynasty last night? I think I look good. I look the way I did when I started acting. He walked into the kitchen where Mark Miller was sitting and threw the script on the table.

I've got to kiss Linda. What the hell am I gonna do? It had been reported in the press that the AIDS virus had been cultured in saliva, although there was no evidence that the disease could be passed through kissing. Rock did not consult his own doctors. Gottlieb says, "I would not have advised a passionate kissing scene with anyone.

Rock discussed and fretted about the kiss with Mark. Mark says, "He was trapped. He felt, either you announce you have AIDS, or kiss the lady. I asked Mark why Rock did not tell the producers he had an infection in his mouth and could not kiss anyone. Mark said, "You couldn't suggest things hke that to Rock. He would wave you away and say, 'It's my kiss, not yours.

Rock made what Mark calls a "career decision. It was the ruthless, tunnel vision he had applied to all decisions in his hfe, and it did not change. Rock knew, though, that "way down the line, I'm gonna pay for that kiss. Die Nasty. Mark says that he, Rock and George still believed they could keep Rock's affliction quiet.

All of a sudden, there would be an announcement that Rock Hudson had died of cirrhosis of the liver. He would die quietly; we should have known better with Rock. On the day the kiss with Linda Evans was shot. Rock used every gargle, mouthwash and spray he could lay his hands on.

He came home and told Mark, "The fucking kiss is over with. Thank God. The episode went on the air February 6, and George Nader watched it alone in the desert, frozen with dread. He taped the show, played it back and stopped the action. To his relief, he says, "I could see where Rock kept his lips closed and hit Linda on the side of the cheek for a brief, chaste kiss.

He did not open his mouth, no sahva was exchanged. Esther Shapiro, in retrospect, agreed. It couldn't be passionate because Linda loved her husband and was pulling away from Rock. It was understandable to me. No one on the Dynasty set seemed upset about Rock's lack of truthfulness. The cast and crew had developed a fondness for Rock, and their reaction when the news broke was grief.

One director said, "It was a damn shame this had to happen to such a wonderful man. One man, who owns a small business in Los Angeles, said, "He flat-out exposed her, and I can't forgive him for that. I don't trust these doctors who say it can't be passed through kissing. They don't know everything yet. Linda should have been told, so she could make the decision herself if she wanted to take the risk.

When he asked me to rub salve on his back, I'd go in the bathroom afterward and scrub down like a surgeon. On Dynasty, there he was, rolling around the ground with Linda, kissing her, even though his mouth was closed. It was a lifelong pattern: He did not seem vulnerable to guilt. On Monday, November 19, he asked Rock, "How'd the parties go?

I'm leaving town next year. Rock was beginning to accept what was happening to him, and to resign himself not to fight it. He said, in November, that he was through with doctors. He complained that when his blood was taken, the doctors never called him with results. Sugarman takes blood, then nothing.

There can't be any good news, so why the hell go on pulling the fucking blood? I've had it—no more blood tests and that's that! Rock had no further interest in sex. Where in the past, he had loved to hear details of sexual adventures, and was pleased if someone sent him a "care package" of pornography, in the fall of , he did not want to hear or see anything relating to sex.

Dean Dittman says, "If a sexy scene came on television, Rock would shut it off. You couldn't discuss sex around him; he was dying because he'd had sex. Mark Miller felt Rock was giving up. Now, he couldn't have sex, and his career had waned to the point where he was doing a soap opera on television.

He was dreading the future, he saw a way out and decided to take it. Rock had stayed home alone three nights in a row, for the first time since he had arrived in Hollywood in Rock would yell, 'I'll get it! Rock spent long periods in Mark's office, sitting in the hon's-head chair, staring into space.

Mark would be answering letters or balancing accounts, and Rock would say, "I'm gonna die. Rock enjoyed working on the song, but they were not invited to any parties where they could perform, and Rock ended up staying home by himself on Christmas day. They went to a tree-decorating party at Stockton Briggle's, and Stockton remembers Rock sitting by himself, looking thin and unhappy, staring wistfully at the tree.

Stockton went over and sat beside him, put his arm around Rock's shoulders and kept it there. When Stockton learned this, after Rock's death, he was saddened. Stockton himself had been told, ten years before, that he had cancer and might die. I was determined to beat it and I did. He chose to isolate himself and die alone.

Dean had toured with Martha that year in Annie, and one night on the road, when both were drinking, Dean had slipped and told her Rock had "the big A. When Tom Clark arrived at the Christmas party, he went straight up to Dean and said, "What's wrong with our boy?

You've got to tell me, does he have AIDS? Dean saw Tom go off in a comer with Martha Raye, and feared what might happen. Tom Clark says, though, that he never really believed it. Later, Rock said, "Maybe I should have told Wally. But why? It changes nothing. As Rock spoke, his hands moved ceaselessly over his body, scratching, trying desperately to reUeve the itch. He was covered with rashes, in his genital area, on his face, and he couldn't have cortisone to alleviate it because it would affect his immune system adversely.

He had Vincent's disease in his mouth, and two front teeth were loose. He developed contact impetigo, which was highly infectious and covered his chest, back and legs with itching sores. Rock said he could not sleep at night because of the maddening itch. He walked around in jockey shorts because clothing was intolerable—it aggravated the itch.

Mark and James started a campaign to persuade Rock to go back to Paris, to be treated again by Dr. Mark showed him a letter from a friend they had sent to Dr. Dormont after Rock had gone. Bob Darcy. This is a pseudonym; he asked that his name be withheld. Bob had been in Paris six months, and wrote that he was gaining weight and swimming two miles a day.

Doctors in San Francisco had told him he wouldn't see his next birthday, but he was celebrating his birthday in Paris! Mark said he would go over first, rent an apartment, furnish it and Rock could fly in. There's no work in Paris. For what?

Ron's in acting school—I can't take him away. Mark said, after Rock died, "I did everything to get that man back to Paris. If he'd stayed in Paris, he would be aUve today. Bob Darcy is alive today. He lay in the sun, which seemed to alleviate his rashes, but when he returned to the Castle, his weight was down to He sat at lunch with the staff and did not eat.

If he did, he would excuse himself afterward, go upstairs and throw up. The only thing he could keep down was Nutriment. He was slower in his speech and walk, and often had trouble understanding simple questions. Mark began to crack under the strain of watching Rock fade, and being forced to lie and cover up. Mark would drive to the desert every Thursday, sit down at the bar and fall into a catatonic stupor.

It would take him until Sunday to regain his spirits, and then it was time to drive back to the house where Rock was dying, "to Plague Palace, to hell," Mark says. At least I couldn't desert. That's the Iowa farm boy. In March, Rock asked Mark if he could come to the desert some weekend and visit. Mark was surprised, as Rock had never liked Palm Desert.

Come, and bring whomever you'd like. George had not seen Rock in more than a year, since the weekend he had come to visit with Marc Christian in February of George had been warned that Rock looked poor, but the sight of Rock's face was still a jolt. It was hard to believe it was the same face George had known for three decades, the face that the camera had loved. They sat in silence a while, and then Rock sighed.

You've never been right. At the house. Rock lifted his head and looked sternly at George. Ross and Jacque have stopped calling. My agents don't call. Even the fucking doctors don't call. When I stopped acting. Rock said he was sick of spending all his evenings with Dean Dittman, and having to listen to his lectures about God and positive thoughts. What's with the sleeping prince?

According to George, Rock replied as follows. He gave a grim smile. And then he laughed about it. Rock turned back to George, and told him how, shortly after his return from Israel, Christian had confessed to him that he'd taken money for sex. He just laughed and said to listen because there was more. It seems I'd been set up —the 'accidental' meeting was planned.

The rest is history. Jesus Christ, I still can't believe it. Yours truly, set up and seduced. George wrestled with a question he'd been wanting to ask Rock for some time: George tried to gauge whether this was the moment. I just told you, for God's sake, I was finished with Christian, we hadn't had sex for months. And if I said anything to him, he'd run straight to Liberty and she'd have it all over town.

So fuck him. Because it goes with the territory. When Christian came into his office on May 28, Mark said, "Have you heard the latest rumor about yourself? That's ridiculous. That night. Rock was alone in the kitchen when Christian came in and told him the rumor. Why don't you get help? Why don't you go to a good physician, instead of the quacks you're going to? He said to Christian, in a cold, intimidating voice, "What would you do if you had it?

In June, there was a crisis over Christian's Chevy Nomad station wagon. The car had been at Image Makers for more than eighteen months, being restored, and Mark Miller had been paying invoices each week. I won't pay any more. You can't leave me in the lurch. He's been stealing from Rock, by writing up orders of the same parts time and again. I'm trying to protect you, I have all this evidence.

You can't just pull out on me. Christian consulted George Nader's attorney, Margaret Saal, and concocted a plan to get the car off the lot without paying the bill. When Frawley stopped receiving payments from Mammoth Films, he asked Christian what was wrong. Christian told him Rock was upset the job was taking so long and would not pay any more until the car was completed.

Christian said Frawley should stop sending bills to the house. Christian would take them up personally. Christian assured him he would be paid upon completion. Christian told Mark Miller how he had "liberated" the car, and laughed about it. Christian went to Rock and said, "My car is ready, can I bring it up here?

I don't want those people bothering me and coming up here after it. Rock yelled, "I don't want that fucking car on my property and that's that! Ron Channell, who was at the kitchen door when Rock came out, said, "If I were you, I'd go right back in there and tell that guy to move out.

Marc Christian stormed into Mark Miller's office and swore he would bring his car there whether Rock liked it or not. Mark buzzed Rock in the playroom, and asked him to come into the office. Christian and Rock went back and forth, and resolved that the car could be parked at the Castle, but it would have to have a car cover on it at all times.

Meanwhile, James was in a rage and told Mark Miller he wanted to quit. He doesn't own this house. I'm an Englishman, I have an honorable profession. Mark Miller went to Christian and said, "Listen, straighten out your relationship with Rock. Go talk to him. Either you straighten it out, or leave. The house is in an uproar, James is in an uproar.

Nobody speaks. Rock won't even speak to you. That night, while Rock was at the table poking at his dinner. Christian came in and sat down quietly across from him. As a matter of fact, don't even bother to speak to me. We have nothing to say. You've put me through the wringer for two years.

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Mary's ill-advised marriages cost her her throne, and even the brilliant Elizabeth couldn't work out how to marry without losing power. Marc showed a videotape he'd made as a joke for Rock, a tape of himself impersonating Doris Day, in a blond wig and makeup, miming to one of her records. Marc Christian was treating him like a piece of dirt. He looked beautiful to me. Mary might have been considered better looking simply because she didn't have Elizabeth's weird redhead coloring. He chatted with the receptionist, then went down to his car and listened to classical music on KUSC. Particularly interesting are the post Spanish Armada scenes where the Queen is unphased by starving sailors who have returned home and accuses her advisors of ruining the celebrations by bringing it up.

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Becket was very unkind to Eleanore and Maud. So no, a few diverse extras are not a problem, start bitching about more important historical inaccuracies, such as all the face-to-face meetings that never happened and the fact that Mary QoS was reportedly beautiful. Cousine 3-vintage She rides until he cums inside her 1: I could have gotten Rock to go back to Paris for more of the drug and you couldn't.

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